Beslan Mission Trip 2005, Calvary Chapel Pittsburgh

Comforting Those Who Mourn

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October 24, 2006

When you go out to battle against your enemies, & see horses and chariots - people

more numerous than you... do not be afraid of them. For The Lord your God,

Who brought you up from the land of Egypt, is with you. (Deuteronomy 20:1, NASB)

All of us have our own fights & battles that we must face in this life. But regardless of the intensity and the heat of warfare, it's possible to be filled with courage & not shrink back. It's a matter of perspective. I can focus in on the army racing towards me to extinguish my life... or i can lift up my eyes and look to The One Who has promised that He will never leave me nor forsake me – The One Who has promised that He Is for me. The choice is ours – will we trust Him no matter what, or only when the battlefield is clear? Notice that the above verse says when you see opponents more numerous than you and your army, not 'if.' The Lord your God – The One Who rescued you from Egypt & the house of slaves – it is He Who Is with you! So by His grace, let us apply this truth to our own lives this very day. No matter how many 'warriors' have mustered to oppose & battle against you, O servant of God: The Lord your God Is with you! And that's all there is to it.

Monday, 10/16/06 – i saw and talked some with Stas (a young brother and fiend). Told him about the wedding i went to yesterday (and the pagan practices at it), and that now i know more of what it's like for believers living here and the hardships they face. He responded by saying something he's told me before, that they don't have it so hard compared to our brothers and sisters in other countries. That is true, but they still have it much more difficult than we do in the west. Pray for the saints here. Went and taught Madina (Tsabolova, who lost her younger brother in the massacre). She did well, and then i used the net some at their apartment while she went to pick up her little sister, Alana, at pre-school. Alan (the dad) wasn't feeling very good, and remarked, 'I always have stress/pressure (high blood, i presume)' – he often has pain and things. Little Alana came home, and i found two internet games for her and we played some together, and she really enjoyed the time. One game was of a cartoonish mouse going around trying to eat cheese and avoid dangerous things; the other was a rip-off of a very famous game, only this version was called, 'Packerman.'

Leaving their building later, i ran into Alina's (Tsorayeva's) mom who wanted to know why i hadn't visited for a while – told her i would on Thursday. (Her daughter, Alina, and son, Zaur, both escaped from the terrorist attack alive.) She said that Alina mentioned how i still visit Madina, and worried that she (Alina) might have offended me or something and that's why i don't visit them as much. I explained that that isn't the case; it's because Madina often has to help take care of her baby brother, and so that's why i visit them to teach her English at home. I'm happy they want me to visit, and am happy to do so, but it's hard when people misunderstand your absence. I mean, i think that even were i able to visit 3 families that i know here every single day, it would take perhaps around a month for me to just get through that list once. This is of course, to God's glory, a wonderful problem to have! In a nutshell: there is more than enough labor, but it's that thing about the lack of laborers again. Ask Him to send forth more!

Tuesday, 10/17/06 – God blessed me with a great visit at the Farniyev's (believers). Ate, and talked quite a lot with Khazbee and Aza (my friend, Batik's, parents). We looked at verses from The Word as we spoke, and also later prayed for others. They had a questions about the commandment of 'Don't kill,' though God told His people to kill others in The Old Testament. God blessed me to share that the problem is in the translation. In Hebrew, the original language of Exodus and Deuteronomy (which books both contain the 10 commandments), it does not say, 'Don't Kill.' It says, 'Don't murder.' All in all, it was a really great time of fellowship and a wonderful visit! Aza gave me grapes, nuts, and a new mug as i was leaving. The Lord blessed me to give them 2 copies of my CD.

i went in the evening to visit the Totievs (believers who lost four of five children in the massacre). Visited awhile with Raya, the mom; Taimuraz is in Moscow right now at a conference (he is a Baptist pastor). i then taught Madina (and Raya some) English. Madina, who is now fifteen and in 10^th grade, is the only one in her family who made it out of the gym alive – all three of her sisters and her only brother were all killed in the attack. She was the second of five, just like i am... there were four girls in her family, and one little brother – our family has four boys, and one little girl. But now, she is alone. Madina doesn't know very much English, but at the end of the lesson, she seemed to be taking more interest, and even wanted to try some of her own sentences. She's a very sweet girl, and laughs and smiles a lot. The three of us then ate together, and had a very nice time of visiting throughout the evening. Please pray for their family often.

Wednesday, 10/18/06 – Went to the Baptist fellowship this morning. Taught English at the other church's building, mostly to Madina (Tsibirova). The lady who works at the small store nearby (Fatima), her son Tamik came to study, though very late. He is 11 and in the 4^th grade, and seems like a really nice kid. He told me that his mom teaches him stories from The Bible, and i said that was great. Tamik has a dad still living, but for whatever reason, he doesn't live with Fatima and Tamik. I had earlier given Fatima my CD, and Tamik likes it – glory be to Yah! I afterwards tried to visit Rita and Rozita (both of whom lost daughters in the school massacre), but no one was home. I prayed for The Lord to give opportunities to speak of Jesus, and went and visited Mairbek and his family. (Mairbek was in the gym for all 3 days of the attack along with his mother, but his mom didn't survive.) He hugged me when i came in, and was really glad to see me. We watched some of a soccer game on TV, and then Sima (his grandma) invited to have tea and sala (salted, uncooked pig fat!). I went and sat with her and her adult niece, Marina (i think she's her niece). We talked about different things, and The Lord opened the most amazing time i've ever had in sharing with them. God blessed me to share some of my testimony, and how Jesus really has changed my heart; and they both just sat listening (especially Marina), and sometimes asked questions. Yah blessed me to testify of how God Is Able to work in our lives today, and help and change us. (That was one of the most novel concepts i first recall hearing before i accepted Jesus. I was raised Catholic, thought i loved God and knew lots of The Bible's stories. But i guess much of it was just 'knowledge of past events to me.' But one day my dad was listening to a pastor on the radio, sharing how God could help a person quit smoking. At first, it seemed to be such an amazing and incredible idea. But as i shared with Marina and Sima, 'The word “God” means He can do everything... and if God couldn't/can't work in my life now, then that means He's not God, because God can do everything. i listened to a preacher who talked about the necessity to choose who you will follow: there's Heaven, or there's hell. But God's love is shown so clearly in The Bible, that He doesn't want anyone to go to hell. It's simply a fact: if you continue on the road of living without Him, your end will be hell. But He doesn't want that, and that's why He gives us time today to repent.' After hearing such preaching, i realized i couldn't say i was 'Christian' because an ancestor was: i myself had to choose to follow and accept Jesus. To His glory, i did. And in reading The Bible personally, i saw problems between what It teaches and what the Catholic church teaches, and so in time i left Catholicism.) The Lord gave such a great opportunity of sharing in detail about Him, and what He's done in my life, and we talked for a good while. Please pray that God waters the seeds that were sown, and that Sima and Marina turn fully to Him. Afterwards, Mairbek and i played together some. When i was leaving, he gave me a hug again, and i told him that God loved him – and even more specifically, i added that Jesus loves him. Mairbek said He (The Lord) loves me too, and all my family. Amen! And now if only my brothers would surrender to that love.

Thursday, 10/19/06 – Used the internet – reading through my emails, i was again just amazed at God's faithfulness and goodness to me! Went to church's building and washed some clothes. Left to teach English to Madina (Tsabolova), who lost her little brother, Marat, in the massacre. Madina and i ate together, and then studied. She left to get her little sister, Alana, who was at preschool. i sat with Zalina (their mom) as we had tea and talked together. It was so amazing! Yah again opened up a wonderful time of speaking with her, along the lines of several of things He blessed me to talk about last night with Sima and Marina. Zalina asked why/how i came to faith, and wanted to know if i really believed in the dead being raised. In addition to those things, God blessed me to share about the importance of a person needing to decide whether to follow Jesus or not – God gives each of us free will, but we must choose which path we'll walk on. The Lord blessed me to mention how Revelation speaks about believers being with Him, and there being no more tears, pain, and so forth. She asked me what the difference was between her living her life without reading The Bible, or being a reader of It; for she said she may read a sentence from The Bible, and still have no idea what it's talking about. I gave her an example... of course it's possible to live her life without The Bible. But i asked her which was better: if her little daughter Alana woke up at midnight needing to use the bathroom, would it be better for her to try and find it without lights or with a light on? Of course, Zalina mentioned it would be better with a light being on. And so is life – living without The Bible is like walking in the darkness, groping around to try and 'feel' where we are. Zalina and her family are Russian Orthodox, as are the vast majority of people in Bsln; Russian Orthodoxy is not identical with Catholicism, but for all intensive purposes, they're both extremely similar. I shared how i was Catholic, but that Catholics themselves don't believe that they can authoritatively know that they'll be in Heaven after they die. If a person was very good, then they will go to purgatory and suffer, and possibly one day be in Heaven. And i believe that any honest priest will confess that he has faith that he'll be with God, but that he has no absolute assurance. But i told Zalina, 'i know today, 100%, that i'll be in Heaven. My brothers think that's pride, that i think i'm perfect, but that's not it at all. It's like this: if i owe a debt i can't pay, i can choose to enter court and tell the judge i can't pay it – or i can enter court, having accepted a friend's payment which covers all my debt. That's what Jesus did.' (The Bible promises eternal life to all who confess that Jesus Is Lord and believe that God raised Him from the dead. 1 John 5, etc.) One thing i mentioned was how some people have a 'saint-of-the-moment' for each and every situation they may find themselves in. One dead saint can supposedly help you find lost things, another one can allegedly help you with this or that, and so on. But The Bible shows that one of the very reasons Jesus died for us was to give us direct access to The Father. Please keep praying for Zalina. She is an honest mother who has been through such pain and sorrow, and yet sharing with her is not a difficulty – she herself asks questions and seems to be a woman who deep down perhaps wants to believe, and truly know she will see her little boy once again. All in all, it was a very good time and The Lord gave several opportunities to speak truth in love to Zalina. After, i helped little Alana use the computer to paint and so on. When i had to leave later, she was really sad and had tears in her eyes since she wanted me to stay longer. Zalina gave me a bag of apples, saying, 'You can eat them at home when you read at night.'

Went to visit Alina (Tsorayeva) and her family. (Alina, who's about 14, survived the terrorist attack along with her older brother, Zaur.) Talked with her mom, and The Lord gave a really good time of hanging out with Zaur (who i think is about 16 or 17) and bonding with him, and God blessed me to share some about Him. We talked some about the massacre, which he lived through, and i told Zaur that i want him to realize that he's miracle every morning he wakes up. He, like most here, think very highly of America, and so i shared with him what my dear Russian brother in the US told me to tell people here in Russia – America is great not because of her riches, but because of how Jesus has blessed her. (Though i think it's such a pity that we ourselves are too blind to see that, or too afraid to say the same. What an indictment against us, when people from other nations come to our country and become American citizens and see and confess how God has blessed us – and specifically, how Jesus and His teachings have made this country great! They give God the credit for much more than we do. O, that our people would arise from their slumber, and repent and turn to Jesus!)

Friday, 10/20/06 – My shabbat day. In the evening, Adam (a brother and friend) stopped by and invited me to the youth service at the Baptist fellowship across the street. Went, and it was good – Gyerman spoke of how Jesus Christ can meet our every need. Afterwards, Adam, Sasha, and the young guy across the street came over and got the furnace going. Praise be to God! For the past few weeks or so, it had been really cold in the house. Nahzee (the grandma i stay with) is in South Ossetia right now, and so i didn't know how to get the furnace working. Please don't think i'm writing that i didn't know how to turn the thermostat up or what-have-you... the furnace here, as well as the hot water heater, are both really old and, by American standards, archaic – the kind of things you look at and fear blowing up the house 'cos you have no clue whatsoever how to work them. Lord, bless my friends richly!

Saturday, 10/21/06 – Tried to visit Aslan and Soslan (Dzarasov), but no one was home. (Those two teenage brothers both lived through the school massacre.) So, i dropped by and visited with Madina (Tsabolova) and her family; they live two floors below Aslan and Soslan. Alan (Madina's dad) wasn't doing very well today health-wise, 'cos of pressure/stress. Zalina (her mom) really wanted me to call and wish my dad: a happy birthday from their family, great health, and so forth, so i called. Helped Alana (Madina's little sister) find some pictures on the internet to color. Tried to leave a little after 7 to see if Aslan and Soslan were home yet, but Zalina was just about finished with dinner, and said for me to stay or she'd be offended.! We had borscht, and talked. Shared some with Madina about God's mercy shown in The Old Testament. Also, i asked Zalina (who was a nurse) about someone in Bsln specifically that i could speak with regarding Natasha Satsayeva and her condition. (Natasha was in the gym with her three young children – by the grace and mercy of The Lord, they all survived. But Natasha, who's only about 31, now cannot walk as a result of the injuries she received during that nightmare. Natasha has told me that a doctor said she may be able to walk again someday if she gets rehabilitation, but no one comes to her house to provide such a needed service.) Zalina said there's no such person... that this is not America. Madina said, 'Everybody's forgotten already,' and Zalina said that even the Russian Red Cross said they're out of money – she said people are paying now for their services. Please pray that God will help me make the right contact to see if there's anything we can do for Natasha. Leaving Madina's apartment, they gave me some khalvah and a bunch of candy to take with me. The generosity of such families – ones like hers, who lost a child in the terrorist attack – is simply amazing.

Sunday, 10/22/06 – Went to Baptist fellowship – talked with Azamat (Totiev) and friends after. He told me that he'd like to study English twice a week, and so he and some of his friends will start this week. i really thank and bless The Lord for the opportunity to help teach this remarkable young believer. Azamat survived the school massacre, though he lost two sisters and four cousins in it. Though a young man – i think only about 15 – he acted as a hero during the terrorist attack. Azamat, about 13 at that time, had a chance to escape but chose not to because he had little sisters among the hostages. He came to America after the attack to see a specialist as one of his eyes was severely damaged during the tragedy. When the specialist said that Azamat would never be able to see out of that eye again, his dad, a pastor, wept – but Azamat told him not to worry, because that was the will of God. Would that i had such strong faith as that 13 year old boy had. You can see where i got that info from at: http://bmaweb.net/BMALibrary/nparch/mb/2004/041015.pdf i strongly recommend that you check out that link and print it out – it is his father's talk which he gave while in the US.)

Please pray for:

- Stas' mom... she's been in the hospital for a while now due to a low hemoglobin count. She lost her only

daughter in the attack:

- Alan (Madina's father), who constantly has stress and pressure (high blood, i assume). He lost his 10 year

old son, Marat, in the massacre;

- Marina, Sima, Zalina, and their families to open their wounded hearts to The Lord;

- A good contact to try and find rehabilitational help for Natasha;

- The church leadership problems among churches here;

- The volatile political situation in the nearby country of Georgia. There is a good bit of hostility between

Russia and Georgia, and there is concern among some people that things could escalate;

- God's grace and help as i finish up this month of serving here before having to leave... that i may be

faithful, wise, loving, and do all i can with the time and strength which He gives me.

Lord willing, i'll be back in Pittsburgh in about four weeks, and am planning to be there for about 3 months. While in PA, i'm hoping to be able to devote myself to accomplishing several ministry projects with The Lord's help and provision. In addition to ministry in Pittsburgh itself, i hope to:

* Put together two new music CDs, one specifically to again minister to the families in Bsln;

* Help my dad with our animated Christian children's program idea we've been working on, that it will

hopefully take off the ground;

* Put together two books (or booklets) – one on The Character of God, and the other on serving in Bsln;

* Study the Ossetian and Russian languages more in-depth.

And Lord willing, i'm hoping to return again to Bsln in March for a longer season of service. Would you please keep me and all these projects in your prayers? Thank you, and may The Lord, The Just and Returning King, bless you for all your prayers and support in this service. Thank you so much for the vital roles that you play. Glory, praise, honor, and thanks be to Him Who Is at work within us!

Reminding you that He Is our Shield and Defense,

jason

jalazone7@yahoo.com

Do not be afraid! YHWH your God, Who brought you up from the land of Egypt, is with you.

(Deuteronomy 20:1, NASB)